And it's all ok. I'm learning that I can feel big emotions and take care of myself at the same time. Taking care of myself maybe the only realm I really have control of right now. And taking care of myself is good for both me and Little N. The better I get at feeling my big emotions while continuing to take good care of myself, the more full, real, and healthy I will be for today and for the future we grow into.
So it's good work that I want to continue. Good work that is still important to me, despite (or proven by) a two-week setback.